Tag Archives: first meeting

First Impressions!!

Dear Blogville, So I did it, I broke my blog and then unbroke it, it doesn’t look quite perfect yet, but well, it will have to do. Will do some more tweaking in the following weeks, just hope I don’t broke it again. Hope y’all don’t freak out too much when you visit.

Now on to the post…

They say “First Impressions” count for much, but I never really believed much of it till recently. For me normally, I act based on my mood the first time I meet someone, if its a guy, the needle rolls around; polite, friendly, distant or nonchalant. If na babe however the needle rolls around; polite, flirty, interested, uninterested and pick race immediately. So you might meet me and your first impression of me would be nothing near who I actually am. It has always worked for me, I have never minded… Till recently.

Let the following story be a lesson to you dear readers, that first impressions do count…

Extract from 8 years ago

I pretty much lived a nonsense life back in my undergrad days, alcohol, some drugs and some women mixed with plenty night activities. It was a normal thing to end up with a random girl for the night, have quick ones in the car and generally live useless lives (when I look back at those times). Now the next morning me and my friends usually drove down to the nearest town to get our heads back from wherever we dropped them the night before. I remember that morning like it was yesterday.. After a particularly wild night in our bid to get our heads back, our dear friend rolls up in his car to pick us up. On entering his car we noticed something in his back seat and on closer examination we saw that it was a red pant (I shit you not). As if that was not enough, my dear friend proceeded to explain to us who the girl was, and when we did not understand, took us to her room and literally showed her to us (as in). Why is this coming up? Hmmm…

If you must screw yourself over, make sure you use protection.. If you didn’t understand that here is another one… If you must crap in your pants, ensure it doesn’t smell.

I met the girl last month and although she did not know who I was, I knew very well who she was (8 years later). We think first impressions only occur when we actually meet someone? As in introduction and things? Believe me some people started hearing your gist 4 years before they actually met you. Yes it has happened to me several times. Find below an excerpt of two different conversations I have had

Scene 1

Dangerous looking guy: Hey

Me: Sup

Dangerous looking guy: You are John right?

Me: Yeah

Dangerous looking guy: Just hailing

Me: Ok, cheers.. (and I took off)

Scene 2

Relative: John Doe?

Me: Yeah, who are you?

Relative: You mean you don’t know me? How is your son?

Me: *blank stare* (thinking: oh shit not again)

Relative: I am your relative

Me: Ooooh, sorry sir (kindly piss off let me be on my way)

Point being that anyone and everyone might have an impression of you without you actually doing anything to deserve it. Moral being, if it breathes, it has gist, if it stinks, the gist will most definitely go round.


Single Nigerian Man

Disclaimer: This is actually a test post, it looks like total bollocks to me, please don’t use it as a first impression for this site, there are worse posts.

Please comments on new site structure are very welcome. I need am badly so I don’t feel like I wasted loads of time here.

Oh yes, all references to my real life status have now been deleted.. Can’t have people linking all this stuff to me. NEVER!!

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First Date with Prince Charming?

Yeah the title sucks, I know, but I could not think of another name for this

So here I am again sitting at yet another table, with yet another date and rather than talk to her and see how it plays out, my mind has wandered yet again. Thinking theories, playing out acts and trying my best to be polite while thinking a way out of yet another mess I could put myself into.

Here’s my thought train…

I know, yes I know that every woman wants her Prince Charming to come sweep her off her feet and do his charming things and win her heart, but really, right from time immemorial, Prince Charming has been looking for his Crown Jewel as well to compliment his charming nature and well make him look more charming than usual.
That may sound sexist but yes, he needs you to compliment his nature, you need him to be your rock. Finish!! Daas all. Now I have talked about my sandwich theory, my hem line theory and type-o-graphic errors. Although I may have applied it to women (because I am a man), I do understand it works both ways.

Funny how no matter how much one wants to get a Prince Charming, no one is really ready to kiss a frog to get one.

However I do not understand how a girl can expect to get her Prince Charming when she isn’t no Crown Jewel. If I were to apply my sandwich theory I would say, if it looks like meat, tastes like bread and moos like a piece of meat, the damn thing is bread. It can moo all it likes, wear two horns and have nine udders (technology has done wonders), but it can’t be meat. In other words sweet empty words, no matter how sweet and no matter how many actions back it up are still empty. The first three letters of the word action are A, C and T. Now girls think being a Crown Jewel has everything to do with being shiny, glossy and all made up. The bible, my bible says that a good wife is made up of good character and any woman with only honeyed up lips, and oiled up speech should be labeled #suspect (I didn’t say so, Solomon did) and I should beware. Yes I am very a-ware so I will be b-ware. How did I get here?

Yes. This lady sitting in front of me is expecting me to be a good guy, she be expecting me to say all the right words, do all the right things and make all the right moves. I on the other hand am sitting here with my mind very far from here, my head making the usual buzz I get from type-o-graphic errors, but saying all the right things, doing all the right things… However I do draw the line at making all the right moves. I am a good actor yes, but no I am not that good. Did I say doing all the right things? Ahhh, I lied.

Why would I do that?

Thanks to Beyonce and all the other single ladies, women now think it’s their absolute right to decide whether or not a guy fits the bill and dump him as they see fit (forgetting most times that it does work both ways). Please men, let them. It is less stress for you, less pain for them (unless you actually want something more, in which case you are screwed). When it comes to that, I chuck ego in their face and let them have it all. I will fight for one woman and one woman alone (my wife). That fight however, is not today.
Hopefully it will come soon.

“Saying you are a good guy/girl many times to a mirror doesn’t make you a good guy/girl. It makes you someone who talks too much. .”

Beauty is everything; a beautiful mind, beautiful heart and a beautiful character. I will rather have all three than have a beautiful wicked woman, with absolutely no manners.


Single Nigerian Man

And finally, for all them that love Proverbs 31, kindly read Proverbs 30 first.

DISCLAIMER: Please I don’t hate women, I actually love them. A lot.

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