So here’s the thing: I haven’t seriously dated anyone in two years. I’m not counting the year I spent with Lover A as a relationship. No, it wasn’t a relationship; it was a waste of time. Moving on…
People usually tell me that I’m pretty and smart and other delightful things. I look in the mirror every morning and I agree. I’m not at all bad to look at. But some way, somehow, I always attract the wrong kind of guys. Guys that want company when they don’t have a better option, guys that ask you to help them with picking out stuff for their new apartments, guys that take you out and are all chummy with you but never ask you out, guys that just want to have sex, guys that don’t know what they want but want you to be with them in their cluelessness, etc. You may say, “Maybe it’s the way you carry yourself.” Or “Maybe you’re so good a friend they don’t want to ruin it with a relationship” or even, “At least your market is selling”. Before you tell me that in the comments, just know now that I think it is bull. I’ve thought about it and think that good men are just truly hard to find. Just like how original Ray Ban wayfarers are hard to find.
Anyway, today’s post is mostly about Mr. Wonderful. Mr. Wonderful hit me like a train! Charm, looks, sense of humor, everything! Just when I was confident that I had finally begun to attract the Mr Rights of this world, Wonderboy pulled a Houdini on me. I was stunned and was in my disillusioned state for a couple of days. In those couple of days, I read almost every blog post on dating sites about Houdini men, I cried every night, I imagined and sometimes dreamed my phone was ringing when it wasn’t. I replayed every single conversation we had in my head, asking myself where I acted or said something to turn him off. In fact that same week, I had already started receiving therapy from a friend of mine when Mr. Wonderful reappeared blaming his disappearance on work. He apologized profusely wondering why I was so mad;
—imagine! As if I was the crazy one!
Please, people of God, am I crazy for being worried about Wonderboy when he disappeared? Should I have done nothing instead of calling him twice (without him picking or returning) OR should I have blown his phone up and out of this galaxy?!
And more importantly, how do you propose I make Mr Wonderful atone for his sin?!