Once Upon a Stranger

the invisible man? where?
Single Nigerian Man

On a dark, warm night somewhere in Lagos not too long ago, a stupendously beautiful girl (okay…me) sat fiddling around with a (borrowed) laptop. Was it fate that caused her to Google “single Nigerian blogs”? One wonders. Whatever force lay behind it, though, Google she did. Somewhere on the first result page (practically at the bottom), she hovered a while before finally clicking. And there our story begins.

There she discovered an entity, Single Nigerian Man, who tickled her something. Abeg o! I mean, he aroused… erm, ignited… sparked?! Mstcheew. He didn’t bore me within the first five minutes, sha. So I read his views on a wide array of random and serious <cough> issues, getting slightly freaked out with every word.

On paper… erm, screen, we seemed the perfect kindred spirits! Weird, abi? He too dreams of that ultimate no-holds-barred relationship. He too couldn’t care less about the size of his wedding- personally, 10 people on my guest list is more than enough. He too gets derailed by his healthy imagination every time he opens his mouth. He too believes firmly in old-fashioned romance, despite the ubiquitous evidence to the contrary. I could go on, but sense I should stop.

So it was with sweaty palm that I put pen to paper… Okay, ah! I sent him an email applying for the advertised slot, you know, so I could work under him.

On his blog!

Thus began our little… hmm… acquaintanceship? Work relationship? Whatever you wish to call it. Already, there are things I do not like about him. This is a good thing, though. Now, the first thing my bff told me when I relayed this gist to her was, “I don’t want all the details now. I can forgive anything, but IS HE FINE?!”. Let me answer that here. Short of the ajebo-looking feet everyone else has seen, I haven’t the slightest clue what he looks like. He is one of those. People who blog anonymously in order to discuss things they know they would be disowned for…

Anyway, he sounds (relatively) reasonable over the phone, so let’s give him a break. So far, we have tweeted and texted and emailed. There is yet hope of redemption for him, jare.

From now henceforth, my bff (see above) shall be known as Dahling! since this is what I actually call her.

Also, Single Nigerian Man shall be known as either His Majesty (HM) or Not-So-James-Bond (NSJB). Heehee… looks like New King James Version, abi?

Till next time, children. Ciao! šŸ™‚

14 thoughts on “Once Upon a Stranger”

  1. Now the phrase “working under him” does not evoke clean thoughts in my mind.
    Now I have to purge my mind tonight..
    Glad to know the train of thought that led you to me, kills many questions in my mind

  2. I quite like the anonymity of SNM’s blog. Sometimes looks get in the way of personality… and it seems like being able to hide behind a mask brings out the best in SNM… šŸ™‚ Somehow i guess those who know him personally would be shocked to discover the side of him expressed here…

  3. Miss Meddle cracks me up. I like her.

    I also like the fact that SNM is anonymous. i believe It allows for more honesty .

    P.S i see you took me of your blogroll……..*Cracks Knuckles*

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