Dear Brother Abraham,

I have never met you and you will never meet me but I strongly believe I have to let you know my mind. There are many people in life that do things for seemingly no reason. However I have come to see, been made to believe that this is not the case. In many cases there is usually a reason for everything a man does no matter how deeply ingrained it is. Please Brother Abraham, what is yours? I would like to know what drives you, what motivates you? What on earth am I talking about? Yes, the time has come to let you know that:

I have heard news about your activities, I have seen numerous young children running around with your name on their lips. Now that for sure is a good thing after all since many children know the name of their president, Goodluck, Tuface, MI to name a few. However I am sure that if Tuface were to see these kids (lets make it local), he wouldn’t find some having his eyes, others his nose, ears or forehead, they wouldn’t have his lips, neither would they have his last name. If it were numbers between 1 and 3, I would understand, but the numbers quoted in reports are staggering, as none of them were from the same home (the numbers could be used to start a new community. Yes, I heard that much)

As a kid growing up, I was one of many that sang the song “Father Abraham had many sons, many sons had Father Abraham, I am one of them and so are you…” But I am sure of two things

  1. Our Sunday school teachers had no intentions of us living like you Brother Abraham. I don’t know if that is your motivation or your excuse but please Father Abraham had only two children.
  2. If I was singing that song in Sunday school it would have some sort of impact on me if all the children singing the song were from my father.

Now I know that every man, young and old has some sort of aspiration to be a footballer, but then I believe (my view) that if you must be a footballer, you must be a footballer of one club and any goals scored should be own goals. Striking in the another club’s net is most definitely not allowed. A case where a man is a full blown striker, scoring goals at random, changing clubs every week is not acceptable. If you must score goals for other clubs, please do it in training, where goals do not count. But I guess that advice is a bit too late for you Brother Abraham.

Finally, I believe the statement be fruitful and multiply has been given a whole new definition for you, you have been really fruitful and you may have started a whole new community, but then a scenario where the number of fruits is directly proportional to the number of trees simply means that the farmer should be put down and I don’t mean by physical death. I mean the farmer’s tools should be taken away.

Three different references Brother Abraham, all for you. Hopefully you will get to understand at least one.

Yeah yeah, I know you got swag, but Brother pull your pants up, strike for just one team, farm on one tree and please make that song for the kids just that, a song. Thank you.

Disclaimer: This post is not directed at anyone in particular, no animals were harmed in its production, no plants were burnt either. And yes, this post has nothing to do with any football playing, farming or Sunday School teaching.


Single Nigerian Man

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