Being a Gentleman

Being a dignified gentleman is not about how much you have to give as much as it is the desire to give however much or little you do have – Jane Helpern

Now first of all (not introduction), that very day(Valentine’s Day if you did not get the memo) is now 10 days away. This means we have 10 days of (for us single or near single people) walking around with our eyes, ears and lips closed. Praying earnestly for the 15th of February to come because it means that once again we can have relative peace. People will be talking about their partners, their spouses and what they intend to do for them. On that very day I can see myself sitting down quietly at my desk working, while the colleagues, will be opening packages received and planning sweaty, romantic nights and weekends. We all know the drill. 9 months from now there will be a plethora of babies and it will be another year gone by without my dreams of Lil’ Miss Sunshine coming to fruition.


Looking at the quote above, while I would say I nearly tend to agree to all she said, there is a slight problem. Being a gentleman to any lady, most particularly Nigerian ones is based on the lady’s perception of what a gentleman is. I mean, some people think that guy from 50 Shades of Sex Positions Grey (or something) is the perfect gentleman. Some people would look at the above definition and just laugh because that concept does not even exist in their world. I mean it is not as if defining a gentleman is like defining a square. A square is a square anywhere in the known world (other planets may say it is a circle). And with a square in mind, here is a definition of the word gentleman


  1. A chivalrous, courteous, or honorable man (note the lack of the use of the word and)
  2. A man of good social position, esp. one of wealth and leisure

See the problem? E mean say if I get money, I don turn gentleman be that abi?

Anyways, having my series in mind on the whole Love Sex or Money thing. Question of the day is this. Which would you prefer a man to be a dignified gentleman in? What is your definition of gentleman?

Having all of the above in mind, find below my definition of a gentleman…

  1. A gentleman will open the door for any lady, just not his not just his.
  2. A gentleman will have you over for the night and will leave you untouched
  3. Based on a gentleman is most likely gay (by gay I mean happy)
  4. A gentleman will tend towards caring and protecting for the gentler sex

As I was writing all of the above I remember the species called the ‘Independent woman’ constantly trampling on the gentleman since the 1950’s. Now that last sentence was/is a joke. No offence meant.


Single Nigerian Man

Disclaimer: Nothing I say on here should be taken seriously, even at the best of times

In Other News: Just when I was so close to actually getting someone to spend Valentine’s day with, my dear friend decides to go pick that very day for his wedding. If you ever read this dude, you are not dear to my heart at the moment. However, I am a gentleman. I forgive you.

7 thoughts on “Being a Gentleman”

  1. Lmao. Please stop beefing those of us whose parents enjoyed Vals day. That said, I particularly have never liked that day. Like seriously? All the fuss and ish??? Makagini?

    Gentleman ba? You ma know it is very relative. Think the dictionary’s definition is enough proof of that. Ever heard about the Yoruba proverb that paraphrased says gentlemen are mumus? I dunno how to write or say it biko.

    I do agree with yours sha Every (or most) women want gentlemen (whatever the definition meant to us). That said, we independent women won’t trample on gentlemen no more.

  2. I agree with all of the definitions of a gentleman. However I think a real gentleman is loving, caring, providing and so on but also assertive. To whatever guys and ladies reading this, being a gentleman does not mean being a pushover, it means having an opinion and knowing what you want but communicating it politely and politically and be willing to negotiate.

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